Friday, June 20, 2008

attractiveness :: swagger



So I was talking to one of my friends about a potential guy that was interested in him. He is very good looking, tall, intelligent, funny, great job, apartment, car and a good heart.

"I'm Just not feeling him."

But why?

"He doesn't have that swagger I like?"

So I was wondering? What is "swagger", how do you get it, and is it important to have if you want to attract someone? The dictionary says that swagger is: To walk or conduct oneself with an insolent or arrogant air; strut. To brag, or boast. To me it seemed like confidence, and the guy sure had that. But my friend stated that it was something more.

Swagger is more hood, that "don't give a shit" attitude. That sex appeal, that  overwhelming masculine aura that surrounds you. It's the "what's good" or that "let me holla son" It's the thing in a man that makes him even more attractive.

Does swagger only equate to "thug appeal"

Then I was thinking that maybe my friend wasn't attracted to him because he had some small female tendencies (you know like most gay men). Yet don't females have a certain sense of swagger as well? Could this guy not have a professional swagger? or a intelligent swagger? or a gay swagger?

So let me ask you guys these questions?

1. Is swagger something you have
    or something you do?

2. Does swagger only equate
 to masculinity?

3. Is there a different between 
     confidence and swagger?

17 comments:

Mr. Jones said...

To me, swag has NOTHING to do with being a thug or being hood. There's a certain respect I give a man who operates in a confident and commanding fashion. Swagger, to me, also has a lot to do with humility. Yes, an arrogant attitude does not swagger make, in my mind.

Swagger should be natural. Not everyone inherently has it. I suppose it could be taught/learned, but then it comes across as contrite.

Bitches can have swagger, too. Trust me. There's something about a confident woman who is obviously in control and on top of her shit. That's kinda sexyt, too.

ShawnQt said...

Are there any examples of guys (celebrities perhaps) that you feel have "swagger"?

bLaQ~n~MiLD said...

Question Shawn... Why do you ask follow up questions to everyones comments? Why can't their comment just live? It's like the French inquisition. LoL.

~Damnit!

Mr. Jones said...

Blaq, hush. LOL.

Shown's giving us his best Diane Sawyer. Besides, it's his blog. he can live. LOL.

As to your question, Shawn. Lemme think about it. I'll come back.

bLaQ~n~MiLD said...

Or a 21 year old Barbera Walters! Sorry, I'll proceed to back away and watch...

~Damnit!

ShawnQt said...

sniff sniff
Do I smell swagger in here? lol.

Darius T. Williams said...

So let me ask you guys these questions?

1. Is swagger something you have or something you do?

It's really a combination of both. It's something you have - no one can give it to you. Based on you having it, it's also what you do. It's a sorta confidence and an air about yourself that hovers between the fine lines of confidence, humility, and arrogance.

2. Does swagger only equate to masculinity?
Oh no - of course not. You can be feminine with swagger. You can be masculine with swagger. You can be a woman with swagger.


3. Is there a different between confidence and swagger?

Surely there is. Confidence is the belief in particularly self. Swagger is the interwoven actions that one either does or portray based on his level of confidence.

I think it's the great combination of the both that gets us boys going.

fuzzy said...

I think swagger is something you do. I was actually discussing this matter on last night with a friend. I believe that swagger can change upon environment and situation. Just as confidence and behavior changes in environments and situations.

I do not think that swagger equates to masculinity, but I do believe that it is often referred and compared to masculinity.

The words used to define swagger have to deal with confidence and their levels of confidence. To strut you would need to be confident in yourself. to brag you would be overly confident and so fourth and on!

Thoughts said...

1.Swagger is something you have. I think that a person cant help their swagger. Some people are more attracted to a certain type of swagger. Personally, I prefer softer men who have a tad bit of a switch in their walk and doesnt give a shit about who has anything to say. That shit is sexy to me.

2. HELL NO! As you saw in my first answer, I like the feminine swagger rather than the hard-core thug swagger. Dont get me wrong, I still love a manly man and their walk is always something good to look at...but thats just not what I want right now.

3. Swagger goes hand in hand with confidence. The level of confidence a person has helps to magnify his swagger. People who have a swagger, usually has great self confidence. Your swagger lets people know non-verbally that I know I am looking good and I want you to come holla at me.

Shawn...i guess today was question day...LOL.

Anonymous said...

I think swagger is something that everybody has. Everyone has their own swagger. Its something that is just apart of you. It could be a school bou swagger, thuggish swagger, feminie sagger, ect, ect ,ect. Its just a certain aura or vibe that you put into the air. No, swagger doesn't equal masculine. Someone could have a masculine swagger but like I said I think depends on the person. Confidence is not swagger. I think confidence can be apart of a persons swagger tho.

Nario said...

Swag...hmm it's to me just hmmm, it's a combination of masculinity and confidence. it's a natural effect that people give off when in range. Damn and it's something that can't be duplicated...celebs to me that give off swagg IMO would be Columbus Short, Chris Brown, Fiddy, Jay-Z and that white dude Daughtry. IMO Female examples would be Fantasia, Monica, Mary J back in the day and my grandma she go hard in the paint..you should see her at church. oh T.I. got a lil swag about himself....

ponoono said...

SHawn I had to reread this.. I thought you were talking about saggers !

kennyking78 said...

To me, swagger is all about doing things a certain way. I admire my mother' swagger when it comes to the way that she raises and runs her household. I admire my friend Xavier' swagger when he walks into a room and gets attention just for being himself.

I don't think that it is has to do with masculinity exclusively. Perhaps that is just what your friend meant by it.

Q said...

Jay Z definitely has that swagger. That is exactly what hooked Bey! Well, that his huge d*ck...

K.C. said...

It's interesting that you brought this up because recently the guy I'm seeing said he was more attracted to me when I had cornrows instead of the dreads. I guess for him 'swagger' would equal masculinity, a physical trait. Nowadays, I think the opposite. I think it's something you have, not what you do. And swagger is definitely different than confidence. For example, I'm not as attracted to my current date as I was to an old bf who, while not out, was very confident in who he was and what he liked. He wasn't rich, wasn't a supermodel, just an average guy. That spoke to me and still does (see post on Jamaica).

A guy can front with the fanciest car, the tightest game, freshest clothes but if he can't "bring water for my mind" then it's just a simple facade, or in other words, a simple swagger.

Bullet Proof Soul said...

1. Is swagger something you have
or something you do?

Swagger is just a colloquialism for confidence in self much like "je ne se qua", "it factor", etc. It is just something you have in you. You know who you are and you are comfortable with it. It comes naturally and easy to you. It is noticeable to others because it is pure. It can come in any package because it is just organic. Be it a thug, business executive, etc.

2. Does swagger only equate
to masculinity?

Not at all because anyone can have swagger be they are young, old, man, woman, ethnic or not, etc.

3. Is there a different between
confidence and swagger?

In my opinion, there isn't a difference. Just like there isn't a difference between sexy and confident or intelligent and confident. To be these things takes confidence. It's a requirement.

j_shanlin said...

soooo another great post by the great one...

1. Swagger is something that you have, it's someting that some people are born with (inate) and then sometimes it's something that is created by circumstances

2. swagger does not equate to masculinity..

3. and swagger and confidence are fraternal twins to me. if you have swagger you have confidence.

Follow Up.. i think everbody has their own swagger in their own way. but some celebs that i can think of with swagger are the following: of course the queen Beyonce has that killer performance sweet country fashionista swagger

Steve Harvey has that cool daddy 3 piece suit swagger

Keyshia Cole has that hood almost masculine Mary J swagger

Fantasia has that down home country/hood swagger

Barack Obama has that white collar by day dirt off ya shouldas by night swagger

(just to name a few)