I remember my first day, when I knew no one, and I was all alone. It was a new start... to shake off all the days I was teased and taunted from elementary school and be the man I wanted to be. No longer would I be the nerd I once was, and dare I say it... finally have a girlfriend. No longer would I make up girls in my head, I could have one for real. She would be light skin with long hair, because I mean, didn't everyone want the same thing? I would be able to play basketball with the guys and actually be really good. They would think I was cool, and we would go to the mall to pick up chicks. Trying to see who got the most. Yeah high school would be great, if I wasn't so alone.
I went to my first class. There she was... Ms. Brock. The most Afrocentric and dramatic teacher I have ever met! She was poised, intelligent, and smiled with a devilish grin. If you THOUGHT of coming to her class late, without your homework, or without a book... she had a nice speech for that azz! F didn't stand for Fun. I was on point with her. Who knew, and I model her teaching style with my own class.
I remember walking down those big/long hallways scared I wouldn't find my next class. Everyone was so much taller then me, how could I even see above everybody? As I moved from class to class, lunch time was coming. I dreaded going. How embarrassing to go to a new school and sit by yourself? I was never the social type. All I learned was to hide so nobody would bother me. That worked for me. I missed my old friends, and then I heard....
SHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWNNN!!!
Could it be? I could recognize that high pitched voice anywhere! It was my female CUZ from another Auntie! We met in 6th grade, and when I moved to another school, there she was, always there to help me off the ground whenever someone knocked me on the floor. And now, here she was again to rescue me in high school. As much as I wanted to be a man and get through this alone, it comforted me to have her by my side. She needed me, just as much as I needed her. As she dealt with family problems and and strict parents at home, being with me was her safe haven.
I remember at lunch we walked in with confidence. We were going to do this together again. I was the artist. She was the singer. We was the best of both worlds at Arts High. It was very much like FAME, just more ghetto. As we had lunch, we sat at her sister's table. She was a Junior. Man I was so happy! If everyone knew I was related to her, then I would most def get cool points. So, as always we introduced ourselves as cousins to everyone! Hopefully my "nerdism" wouldn't fuck this experience up as well.
I remember having hamburgers and vegetables that day. As I looked over and saw this COOL GUY. He was at a table with a whole bunch of guys just cracking jokes, beat boxing, and just had everyone laughing there azzes off. Now he was cool.
"Go talk them," My CUZ said. "I know you don't want to hang around us girls all the time."
As much as I did enjoy their company, I knew that I would have to hang out with other guys if I really wanted to be BoyzIIMen. I loved that group, they just came out to. There songs really stuck in me all through high school, but anyway...
Before I could get up enough guts to say something to them, the "COOL GUY" came up to me, and told me to come over.
"Is that your girl?"
As much as I wanted to say yes, I told him she was my cousin. It was still in good company. She was beautiful. Short Halle Berry Hair, greenish hazel eyes, petite, yet tall, and the perkiest boobs ever! She had a flat booty though, but hey, she did have some white in her.
"That's cool, yo come over to our table and chill with us."
Is this for real???? But I kept it cool. At the time I had on this fly azz sweater, and everyone at the table kept telling me how nice it was. I never had nice clothes before, but I demanded my mother to hook me up. I told them it cost 50 bucks.
yeah.
It was only 20.
But they didn't know, and they believed me. This is high school, you got to do what you got to do to fit in. But in the end, I remember that they really didn't like me because of my clothes, but because I was actually cool. It didn't matter that my cousin's sister was a Junior. It didn't matter I used to be a nerd in my old school. All that mattered was I had two friends...
My CUZ and COOL GUY...
and they was going through high school right along with me, and we were was the best of friends through all those years!
14 comments:
I feel you on this post. It seems like I am one of the very few people my age that hasn't been married or has children (surprise surprise).
I think you should go to that reunion. You have accomplished probably more than most of your classmates. You might be shocked.
My ten year reunion is in 08 too... CLASS OF 98 rocks!
Yup - that's right. You should go!
You know, even if I were Mr. Str8, I still wouldn't be married and with kids right now! I've always been one to say that I wouldn't get married before 30 or have kids. Number one, women are EXPENSIVE! and two, kids are EXPENSIVE!, and 3, I don't like sharing my bed for more than 2 nights! LoL. Call me selfish. I find peeps rush into marriage at 23 and divorce by 34 (Hence the abundance of single mothers in their 30's). Take ya time and work on your career.
On that note, go to your reunion Shawn! I know I'm going to mines next year (Yes Dayne Class of 98 does rock!) You have acomplished many things!
~Damnit!
Shawn, don't even play yourself by not showing up to your high school reunion. You have a lot to be proud of... (if nothing else, you still have your waist size! Just, please, whatever you do... DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT WEAR THOSE DAMN BANG BANG JEANS!!!)
go to that reunion for the same deep and meaningful and emotional reasons everyone goes... to find out who got fat and who turned out to be actually gay. lamo.
You betta take yaself to dat dam reunion boy. I know dat much. Forget about wat people gone think. If they don't probe on certain issues lol don't give them a reason too. No H & M outfit though lol. That has homo all over it. lmao
Lol @ Bang Bang Jeans too funny
I can definitely relate to this post. I was nerdy and awkward as hell in high school. I was nowhere near popular, but I had my small little clique. I concur...go to your reunion. Who knows? You might be surprised to see who admired/respected you when you were in HS but didn't say so at the time. My HS (class of 96) didn't even have a 10 year reunion. Oh well.
We're in the planning phase of our 10-year reunion (Sorry to break up the 98 love, but 99 was SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better - we partied like it was 1999, and it was!)
This post does so much to me. You know how you go through something, and you remember it, but you never really delve deep into it again? If that makes sense, that's where I am right now...
You know... I never did much to fit in at high school. I guess i was always an outsider from elementary school on up I was used to being passed by. Used to not being included. Used to everything that most kids try to avoid.
It just started turning for me when I started selling stuff. More people knew me and I got a name for myself. I joined ROTC and that helped a lil bit but not much. It gave me a body which the girls liked alot. That was cool!
98 rules...if I was straight I probably would have a kid by now but I'm glad I don't have that problem...lol. I'm not sure if my class is going to have a ten year reunion, but if they do, I will probably be a no show. I didn't really bond with anyone in high school so going to a get together just to measure my life to everyone else is pointless. But you and fuzzy should go to your reunion...
Yo my man! you'd better go to your reunion. You only have one 10 year get together. Enjoy it love it and then move forward!
Let us know how is goes!
Honestly you took some nice pics even in school, mine I feel were awful, well actually I was a nerd in school, lol
I did the same on myspace, deleted a lot of names that were lingering
I have been reading your blog for a while and didn't realize you were my same age. Your post brought up some memories about high school I haven't thought about in years.
I remember how I was so convinced that I was going to make high school different from grade school that I let my mom's friend talk me into a new style. I was going for a s-curl, trying be a cool playa, these females permed the hell outta my hair (lol). But not only was it permed but they made the hair hard, so it set on my head like it was steel. It was just wrong all the way around man. Thank god there are no pictures that document that botched attempt at being a pretty boy... at least I think.
Wow... I can't believe that was ten years ago. A lot of my friends as well have gotten married and many have children or are expecting children.
Unfortunately for me, our school won't have a reunion , since we were an all boys school that was never going to happen. But I did go to an eighth grade class reunion in 04, now that was wild.The ladies looked real hard and most of the dudes were in jail. Time is something else man. Take your time and do you Shawn. I know your friends are making those major life changes and you can feel like you are standing place, but you are not, go to your reunion and nevermind what they might ask you. It only comes once and you will be amazed with life stories people will share about the last ten years of their lives.
By the way the class of 99 has nothing on the Class of 98.
chile you know i am gonna go off...so i won't. ypu have nothing to feel inadequate about or ashamed of so cut it out. you fly, even if only cuz you my best friend. I'll be your COOL GUY! lololol
anyway, yeah...highschool...nah i won't get into my experiences.
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