Wednesday, January 31, 2007











{sigh, i'll be in the gym next monday}


Monday, January 29, 2007

Today is Monday

Picture It? BLOGGER : The Movie!
Think about it... our lives are pretty interesting for a movie! Every day I go to, which is a website where you can add all your favorite blogs, and find out who has updated instantly! Myself, Fuzzy, and Ty use it, and it is very helpful! I read over 20 blogs, and I still need to add more. I don't always comment because sometimes I'm at work, and they call me to do something else, but I do TRY!

Today I found out that my ex updated his blog. Seems that he has a new boyfriend, and he is really happy with his results from the gym. Even had some new photos up. I'm happy for him! I miss him a little. Just because you end a relationship doesn't mean you stop caring for someone, especially if you spent 2 years of your life with him. I am overly happy with Fuzzy, but it would be nice to talk to him and see what he is up to as friends. Last time I saw him, we were both in a restaurant on different sides. He was with his friends, and I was with mine. It was very awkward for me. I really didn't want to ignore him, but I didn't know how to react when I saw him, or how he would react to me. I don't like that uncomfortable feeling. In any case, maybe I will shoot him an e-mail if he hasn't read my blog already.

I always love Clay's Blog, because he has interesting topics to have a debate about. Can Obama and Hillary take the president's spot? My comment was, even if America is not ready for a black man and a white woman, then at least they will pave the way for a Black Woman, aka OPRAH!


Then I was reading Keith Boykin & Darian's blog about the whole cancellation o Noah's Arc. To me, that's bullshit. I love that show, and what is going to happen to my Noah's Arc night! I already have a AMERICAN IDOL NIGHT... and even a small HEROES Night... but in the summer, we look forward to Noah and the crew! So now they are going to pick up the show and make it a movie... great, I think? NEWARK IS NOT GOING TO PLAY THAT MOVIE! I have to go to New York to see it, and what about everyone else? sigh. I will give the actors more money, there will be a bigger budget for a bigger story... but I don't know about this. Will sending letters or marching work? I mean this is all about dollar and cents at the end of the day. I will go out and buy the 2nd season on DVD, but then again I wouldn't mind a box set of both seasons. I have to think harder on the subject to see where I stand.

I so wish I could listen to Trent Jackson's Radio Show at work... when I get home, I have so much to do I forget to tune in, but when no one is in the office, I do crank it up. I love you T, always know that! Me and T would talk about what was going on Blogopia, and it would be so funny! That's why we need a movie!

This post is inspired by Ladynay. I like how she just talks random about what is going on in her daily life, so I was like, why not! Ladynay is the ONLY one I know that updates everyday on time! She should get an award for that!

I'm happy Qua Qua is doing better after his breakup. Breakups sucks. Why can't people just act right! Why can't we act right?

It can be hard when two of your friends that you both admire can't stand each other! It happened once before, but now they are cool. Now it is happening to two of Fuzzy's friends that we hang out with. I hate taking sides. I don't like when people do stupid shit as well. Then again it isn't my biz to get into it, but kinda hard when it effects you indirectly. sigh.

So I have a new computer! LOL
After I said all that in my last post, I got it anyway. Let me explain. Sunday morning I went to Barnes and Nobles to catch up on some reading. I tell you, that is the best library, and you can eat there to! So after I caught up on some comic books, I was reading a book about Creative Visualization. It was all about seeing your dreams and making them come true. So I closed my eyes, and I pictured myself with a new computer. I knew that one day I would have it. So I left the store, confident, but not in a rush. To make a long story short, I saw a great price for what I was looking for in BESTBUY, and I bought it! I'm pretty happy with my choice, but kinda went over $150 bucks (They get you with Antispyware and Security Stuff). So...

I'm going to be selling off some of my action figures, DVDS, computer programs, and more on my blog, craigs list, and ebay. My goal is to reach $200 bucks that will go towards the cost of my new computer. I will also have autograph photos of my ass up for bid as well! :)

I pick up the computer on Thursday, so overall I'm happy. I can finally design and play Sims2 without any problems!

Looks like Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwiches all this week!

Friday, January 26, 2007

favorite logos

I just wanted to show you guys some of my favorite logos I have designed at my job:


Thursday, January 25, 2007


Sometimes I hate being an adult!

You think that once you get older, and get a job, you can do anything! Yeah Right! I had a friend of mine do my taxes last night, and I am NOOOOOO where getting as much money as I did last year, so that puts a dent into me buying a new computer. Damn Bush! What you going to do? I can't make the IRS give me more money! So I was like, well I can use half the money to get the new computer, and half of my savings to get the rest... but I wanted to get it now! So I called up, ordered the computer, and it seems like my credit is not up to par with me getting monthly payments. (Note: Never let your parents open up accounts in your name!) I don't want to pay the money all upfront! I don't like to make haste decisions when it comes to money. You never know what might happen! My car could break down! Someone might need to borrow money. I might have to pay an extra bill! So I told them to hold it, until I was ready to order.

sigh. I love that computer...

But maybe it is for the best. So I had to "man up" and think logical.

First I have to count my blessings. I have a resonable amount of rent, I have a two bedroom apartment, I have cable, internet, & a house phone, my student loan bills are not that high, I have a cell phone with unlimited text messages, I always have something to eat, I have a 4runner that I got for free, I can actually afford my car insurance, gas has went down to $2 a gallon, I have nice clothes, I can buy any action figure I want, and I have a reasonable amount of money every week. I actually enjoy going to work everyday, and finally feel like I have a career. Not to mention I have a wonderful boyfriend, great friends, a supportive mother, and GOD is hottest thing right now!

My life is really not that bad, so if I can't get a new computer, its ok.
So what I'm going to do is just take my computer to somewhere that can fix the problem, and just keep it until the money comes in where I can buy a new one. Fixing it will be much less then anyway. Just erase everything, and start over! I don't have the original windows xp cd, but Im sure they can figure something out.

I'll focus on getting my credit together, and just save the money for a real emergency.
I'm sure GOD will send some money my way, if I need it, and deserve it.

I just had to let this out because it was really bothering me.
Thanks for listening.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

perfection in the process

I was moved by a scripture in Genesis, that seemed very inspirational to me:

"And the Lord said, Behold, the people is one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do." - Genesis 11:6

This line to me, commits to GOD's wisdom of the unlimited potential of man. We together as one, can do many great and amazing things, and thus also do many ungrateful things as well.

The scripture is taken from the context of the story of the Tower of Babel. The story is used as an origin behind different languages. Many believe that man was trying to build a tower to heaven, to be equal or over throw GOD, thus GOD "confusing" the language of the builders to stop the construction.

I think that this is a mistranslation. By understanding the context of the Babylonians, the reasoning of building Ziggurats, which the Tower of Babel is, was to create a dwelling place for their GOD to enter Earth. They wanted to create a place for GOD to be one with man, not to be over God. Such a place can be seen as a notable honor to GOD's power.

The debate of creating such a "tower" is debatable. Let alone which GOD they created the Tower of Babel for.

In any case, let us look at the intention of the story, if humanity was just trying to honor GOD, why would GOD come down to "confuse" the language of the builders?

Another reasoning of building the Tower was for human beings to stay put in the land of Shinar. They wished to make a name for themselves in the land they were in. Some believe that "making a name for themselves" means to create a name for themselves above GOD... but could this also mean that they just wanted to create a great nation? Let us become the "United States of America," for example. Let us create a country that we can call our own, and be recognized for our human potential. Let us build a great city, but also show honor to God with this tower. yet, They did not wish to go out into the rest of the world. They did not want to scatter, but stay put and be as one people.

It is an conceivable thought to say that GOD created the "confusion of language" as a process of letting human beings know that humans should go out into the earth and multiple, so that they can bring forth not just one nation, but many nations? "Be Fruitful & Multiply." This was a time right after the so called "Great Flood of Noah" Would not the world need to be explored more?

Could not the "confusion of languages" be a test to humanity's potential? Can you still create a world even when you can not understand each other verbally? Can the world be wonderful not only in one language, but in many languages?

God in the original biblical story did not destroy the tower, the people just gave up. Human beings made a choice. This also reminds me of another passage from the Conversations With God Book:

"There is perfection in the process, and all life arrives out of choice. It is not appropriate to interfere with choice, not to question it. It is particularly inappropriate to condemn it. What is appropriate is to observe it, and then do what ever what might be done to assist the soul in seeking and making a higher choice. Be watchful there for of the choices of others, but not judgmental. Know that there choice is perfect for them and this moment now, yet stand ready to assist them should the moment come when they seek a newer choice, a different choice, a higher choice. Move in the communion with the souls of others, and there purpose, there intention will be clear to you.

This is what Jesus did with those he healed. And with all those lives he touched, Jesus healed all those who came to him, or who sent others to him, supplicating for them. He did not perform a random healing to have done so would have to violate a sacred law of the universe. Allow each soul to walk its path." - CWG B1

This to me was a realization of GOD's ability to know what is best for humanity, and also having faith in the ability of GOD's creation. We have to understand the perfection in the process. Even when can't see the finish line, GOD CAN! Even when we don't see the purpose of GOD, GOD DOES! Even when we as human beings don't have faith in ourselves, GOD WILL!

Sunday, January 14, 2007


u like? :)

I was inspired by Bougie to expand on this post from his newest entry, Self-Exploitation: The Analyzation of My Body.


Back in the day, I was Slim with Abs. Now after 26 years, a boyfriend for a cook, and a million french fries later, I have a gut and a plump booty. great! I know most of you guys are saying, ummm... where? Trust me its there, I just hide it very well! Now, I'm not overweight. I am usually 135lbs, never going over 140lbs. NOW... I'm 150lbs! I never been that much! This is a shock, for me! Well 150lbs for my size isn't bad. I just need to turn ALL of that into muscle instead of disgusting fattiness. I'm not saying I'm going on a diet, I'm not saying I'm going to work out everyday... but I am going to make a CONSIOUS EFFORT to come up with a plan to get rid of this mess!

For those of you who don't know who Calvin is. He was suppose to run with me, but bailed out! He is one of my great friends! I showed you guys a picture of him before, but I'll show it again, just to embrass him!

Hey Cal Cal!
He is gorgeous. He has so many admirers, and he is just not into anyone. I respect that though, he has a million jobs and is going back to school. That's more important. Yet having a sexual occasion now and again isn't to bad to! For some reason I kinda push my friends to have sex. I'm always trying to find Omar a man. Omar can pull any brotha he wants, but he is so picky, and doesn't like to just have sex with anyone. But can't you just have sex with Mr. Right Now, while on the road to finding Mr. Right? lol. I should stop, but if I'm having good sex, I want everyone to have good sex! Besides, I like to hear about the hot steamy escapades from my friends. If you can't tell you friends, who can you tell?

You know what's funny? When I first dated Fuzzy, I would tell my friends about how good Fuzzy was in bed, and everyone would be so excited for me, and want to hear more. Now? I tell them about how good Fuzzy is in bed, and they cringe and cover there ears! Did all of the sudden good sex become so bad to talk about? Is it because they see Fuzzy different now that he is pretty much part of the family?

Anyway, back on topic.
When ever I meet somebody new, I would always ask them this question.

What are your three best physical attributes, and your three best personality attributes?
I'm going to ask that question to you guys! Why? Cause I'm curious so just answer it! lol.

Let me give you mine. Please note, don't give an answer of what people think of you, but what you think of yourself.

Three Best Physical Traits:
1) My Lips. I like my lips because they are soft, small, but plump. I am like the best kisser ever!
2) My Nose. This is a new appreciation. It so small and cute, and it fits my face well.
3) My DIck. I'm Blunt, I know, but got to be honest, lol. I will spare you guys the details.

Three Best Personality Traits:
1) My Open Mindedness: I am very open to other people's thoughts & realities. Non Judgemental. A Good Listener.
2) CrazySexyCool Mentality: The lovely ladies of TLC has instilled that in me. Sometimes I think I am a male version of all of them. I can be very playful & youthful, and I like being silly. I like to express my sexuality when ever I can, yet always tasteful. I can also be very laid back, cool, stylish, and get along with most people.
3) Creativity: I have it to no end! Everything I do, I got to do it right! When I'm passionate about something I have to give that extra something to it. Creativity is my Self Expression.


[I'm at work, so I didn't edit the post, but I will later, I promise!]

Friday, January 12, 2007

new bloggers living there dreams

Here is a list of New Bloggers that are Qt Approved!

Jay's Distorted World
He's a complicated individual that is in search for all the answers in life. This may be impossible but life is simpler when there are clear answers. When He's not looking for answers, He's drinking and enjoying life to the fullest. Not only is Jay extremely intelligent, he has the most sincere and sensitive heart. He's not only a blogger, but one of my greatest friends!

Playboy Adonis
A fellow Aries, this sexy yet special kat has people coming to his blog for more. He has a little bit of everything at his spot.
He's on a journey to be an HIV/AIDS Activist, he's a teckie, a singer & poet, and is in 10 year relationship with his current boyfriend. He dishes out his dreams and fears, which makes for a great blog!

Queer Kid of Color
This brother is redefining Queer. My boy is a conservative virgin, and is one of Ballroom Rockstar emerging artists! He writes for... well everybody! He has interviewed many controversial Black Gay Bloggers in his 6 Day Blogger Event, and most definitely a true Black Gay Activist. He's such a cutie to be around!

Living Out Loud with Darian
Born and raised in Montgomery, Alabama. He's traveled the world as a dancer and have lived in New York City, Las Vegas, Los Angeles, and now Atlanta. He's passionate about God, GLBT issues, and living life everyday as if it were his last. He is part of abovethelife's New Video Blog series, and also writes for CLIK magazine. He is truly becoming a Power Homosexual.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007


Seems that my computer is on the brink of destruction. It's making noises. It's not running fast at all. {Pet Peeve #2: Slow Computers!} I can't shut it down properly, and I just can't take it! While I have an anti-virus program on it, I think spyware got to it 2 quickly, and its on its way out. Sure I could just clean it out and upgrade it, but it won't be anywhere near running Windows Vista. Sigh. So looks like I have to bring out the tax money and get be a State-Of-The-Art Computer!

I have always been into technology, it reminds me of the Future! I always wondered what it would be like to live like the Jetsons, Fly into Outer Space like Star Trek, and wonder what Flying Cars would look like. Call me a Geek, but you know you was thinking the same thing! So I'm going Back To My Future ways and getting all these gadgets to bring me into new century!

Dell's Dimension E520
Perform everyday PC tasks with a PC that’s far from ordinary. E-mail, Web surfing, documents, spreadsheets, multimedia and more, the Dimension E520 offers a range of options and upgrades and can be built to meet your specific PC needs. The Computer I designed has a Intel® CoreTM 2 Duo processors: E6300, 2G of Memory, a 160 Hard Drive, 256 NVIDIA Video Card, DVD/CD Writer, 19" Flat Screen and can run Windows Vista perfectly! It's a great computer for my budget.

Playstation 3
This computer entertainment system unleashes a brilliant, high-definition entertainment experience. As its digital soul, the Cell Broadband Engine™ represents a tour de force in parallel processing, which means a gaming experience that is beyond what you know today. Its built-in Blu-ray Disc™ drive delivers a whole new generation in high-definition gaming and unmatched digital media storage. Whether it’s gaming, Blu-ray movies, music or online services, PLAYSTATION®3 invites you to Play Beyond.

iPhone combines three products — a revolutionary mobile phone, a widescreen iPod with touch controls, and a breakthrough Internet communications device with desktop-class email, web browsing, maps, and searching — into one small and lightweight handheld device. iPhone also introduces an entirely new user interface based on a large multi-touch display and pioneering new software, letting you control everything with just your fingers. So it ushers in an era of software power and sophistication never before seen in a mobile device, completely redefining what you can do on a mobile phone.

Any other futuristic gadgets I should look into?

Friday, January 05, 2007

reclaiming my name :: part 2


When I tell you GOD is Hottest Thing right now! Heck, GOD is a classic! Never goes out of style! GOD always knows how to fulfill you, and keeps your head up when you been sitting in that room for 2 hours. GOD keeps you standing when you get nervous in front of the judge. GOD puts a smile on your face when the Judge says all your tickets are dismissed!

I want to personally thank my Mother, Fuzzy, My Boss, My Friends, all the people down at the Court, & all the bloggers that sent me prayers! My Step Father is still at Large, but with GOD's help, he will be brought to Justice, One way, or the other!

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

getting some things off my chest

* While I know that people have other engagements, I was kinda upset that some people I really admired didn't show up to my Christmas Party, and then didn't even tell me! Telling Fuzzy is not the same thing!

* Why can't TJ (my dog) just pee on the pad! Is it really that hard? Stop missing you Bitch Pee-er!

* I don't like when Fuzzy leaves food or drinks out, and then falls asleep before putting it away. I just have to accept it, and put it away for him... but don't think I won't have an attitude while doing it!

* Why in the hell did they make the PS3 so damn expensive, How many streets I got to hustle on to get one?

* My Boss is a Jehovah Witness, and I'm glad he is, but does he have to convert me every other day! Then tell me that I shouldn't be gay, and I would make a great hetrosexual. I can see it now, boning every woman I see, while shooting a gun in the air, I mean that's what you did right?

* Beyonce I love you, but just stop it! Can I get a B-Break!